Pirates - what happened to proper pirates?

Pirates, apart from robbing at sea (or sometimes on the shore, without a commission from a sovereign nation), also treated the many pirate traits we know and love as a way of life, a 'faith' or religion named 'Piratism'.

Blackbeard - the archetypal Orthodox Pirate.

Modern day pirates, rather than having eye patches, wooden legs, parrots etc, are more likely to have small motor boats and automatic weapons - but how did we move from the one state of affairs to the other?

Simon - the typical Protestant Pirate

The Dancia White (Danish Cargo Ship) - attacked by Protestant Pirates as recently as June 2007. But not an eye patch in sight.

Tools of the Protestant Pirate

The Orthodox Pirates have been marginalised and driven underground by the new, if you like 'Protestant' Reformist Pirates who, hundreds of years ago, made a stand against the cumbersome regulations and years of tradition that had been wrapped up in the practice of faithful Orthodox Piratism, and set up their own branch of Piratism.

Ma-haaarrgh-tin Luther at the doors of the CO-OP (Church of Orthodox Piratism). Note the Uzi at his side marking a tide of change.

The wars did not last long, although good for swashing and buckling, the cutlasses of the Orthodox Pirates were no match for the modern tactics of the Protestants. This was exacerbated by the inequality of body parts (legs, hands and eyes) between the two sides, and soon the remaining Orthodox Pirates only survived in pockets and were beaten.

If you look carefully, you can still spot Orthodox Pirates today, although through fear of persecution, they wear disguises. Does anyone think they have spotted any? Could you send me pictures?

Many thanks - arrrgghh.